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this Page to a Friend.Once upon a time brides and grooms were very strict about the color and
style of wedding attire. There is less and less adherence to wedding
rules than there was years ago. Although today there are still couples
who do it "by the book," formal dress rules are much more relaxed than
ever before. The time of day traditionally dictated style, but white
dinner jackets and grey tuxedos seem, for the time being at least,
to have fallen from grace. The color of choice overwhelmingly appears
to be black, even in the middle of July. A white tie and tails, which
are still worn in many parts of the world for formal occasions including
weddings, have pretty much disappeared in this county.
Flat black fabric in the tuxedo is the most popular choice. There is
somewhat of a trend toward subtle patterns in the jacket or lapel, like
black on black striped fabric or an insert fabric, instead of all black,
on the lapel. Designers like Christian Dior, Pierre Cardin and Perry
Ellis have put their labels on a wide selection of single and
double-breasted shawl collar tuxedos, so there's lots to pick from.
Vests have had a return to popularity in the 90's and are available
in a variety of colors and patterns. There is still, of course, the
traditionally popular cummerbund.
The trend seems to be to set the groom aside by giving him a distinctive
look . This can be done in one of several ways, one of which is having the
groom wear a tail coat (tails) while the rest of the men in the wedding
party wear a shorter coat. Another option is for the groom to wear a vest,
while the groomsmen (ushers) wear matching cummerbunds. Matching the men's
tie and cummerbund color to the color of the bridesmaids' gowns is still
traditional, but even this custom is not adhered to as strictly as it
once was.
The very sound of the words "wedding shopping" brings a feeling of terror
to many a young man. Buying your clothes for this biggest of big days can
be a bit overwhelming, but it will be far more fun if you can manage to
avoid stress-induced bad buys. Here are some tips that may help to keep
you from making poor purchases that are precipitated by feeling under
pressure:
1. Don't rush into anything. No one can force you to buy anything you're
uncomfortable with. Getting comfortable may involve doing some reading;
there are lots of good magazine articles around that are aimed at helping
the groom. If you feel that despite your research you still are still a
novice or still uncomfortable, you might consider enlisting the services
of a professional style counselor.
2. Set a budget for yourself before you go shopping. You can get a good
idea from your friends and what they spent and from the research you do
in magazines and catalogues. Once you have set a budget, stick to it
rigidly. Take all the "extras" into account and then go about shopping.
3. Leave yourself lots of time. There's no percentage in waiting for the
last minute, when you know well in advantage what you need to shop for.
Several months in advance of the wedding is not too early to start. You
will especially need to leave yourself an extra margin of time should
you decide to have something custom-made for you. Ask the tailor with
whom you'll be working what his time requirements are. Remember that
even rentals often require alterations and that takes time as well.
4. A good guideline for rental times is that most tux shops rent from
Thursday evening through Monday morning. Make certain to ask about the
parameters in the shop you're using and, if you're going on your
honeymoon right after the wedding, make sure to arrange to have your
rental clothing returned by a friend.
The "full rental package" usually includes everything you'll need for your
wedding day: jacket, trousers, cummerbund or vest, shirt, tie, suspenders,
studs and cuff links. Color-coordinated socks are usually available for
purchase and you can rent shoes. Top hats, walking sticks and white gloves
may also be available.
5. It's all in the details, or in the case of your clothing, it's all in
the fit. Make as certain as you can that you are being measured accurately.
Don't fall into the trap of assuming you will loose weight. Wearing a
tight fitting outfit for your wedding day will be both unnerving and
uncomfortable. If you are planning to diet, or even if you're relatively
stable with your weight, ask your tailor or the tux shop where you are
renting what the latest date is for a "last-minute" fitting. Set a date
for all the men in your party to be at there. This attention to detail
will help to ensure your and their maximum comfort levels.
6. When it comes to your wedding clothes, you really need to keep top and
bottom into account. Nothing is worse than suffering through hours on your
feet because your feet hurt. Whatever pair of shoes you will be wearing
need to be "broken in" and given a good several hours of test run wearing.
If you possibly can afford to buy instead of renting, you'll give yourself
that much more flexibility with your shoe comfort. Although it's fairly
unusual today to see a high silk hat or "collapsible" top hat, black
patent leather Oxfords, or leather pumps with ribbon bows are still
making an occasional appearance at conservative, dressy affairs.
7. Make certain to discuss your outfit with your bride. Ask her for the
details of her dress, even if superstition doesn't allow you to actually
see it. You will, of course, as will she, want your outfits to coordinate
as to their level of formality, color and style.
8. If you are buying a shirt, not renting one, consider washing and
ironing it before the big day. New shirts, fresh from the package,
often have very peculiar fold lines in strange places.
9. If the event calls for you to wear a morning suit (black in the
morning, gray in the afternoon), keep in mind that traditionally
they are worn only by the groom, best man and fathers of the bride.
Also bear in mind that cravats are worn by the groom and best man
only, with ties for everyone else. The bottom button of your
waistcoat traditionally remains undone . . . I have no idea
where the tradition started, so don't ask! )Check below to
see the answer we got). Your waistcoat should not match your
tie and handkerchief. They should, instead, be made from a coordinating
color.
10. Your boutonniere (flower in your buttonhole) should be made of the
same flowers as those in your bride's bouquet.
11. As for pants length, make sure that your pants are neither too long
nor too short and that the sleeves of your jacket allow for about an
inch of shirt sleeve to show.
12. Finally, consider treating yourself to a professional shave and
manicure the morning of your wedding.
Now that you've gotten your wedding clothes all together, sit back,
relax and get yourself ready for your big day.
The article above, first appeared in the Taconic Newspapers Bridal
Supplement. After it appeared, we got the following letter.
February 20, 1999
Taconic Press
Attention: Judy Lewis
Regarding the practice of the bottom button of the waistcoat.
Edward VII- eldest son of Victoria - was Prince of Wales for 60 years and as such was the role model for the gentlemen of the
court. He was also known for his many excesses - hence the tern "Edwardian
Splendor." It was a time of great excess - notably lavish feasting.
As his girth expanded, the Prince began to unbutton the bottom button of
his waistcoat for comfort. The gentlemen of the court followed his lead -
probably so that he would not be conspicuous - and so the practice was
born, or so I believe."
Respectfully,
Mrs. S. S. Warwick
Red Hook, NY
For More Help, See Also
Groom's Checklist
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